Regrets

Regret flows from the depths of my soul
With the strength of a flood
I have held these gates shut for too long
And though tormenting, they should not be stopped.

The thought of your anguish
Even as I write to you now
Stops my heart cold
As well it should

What I see in front of me
Is a painting of our love
Its most thoughtful brushstrokes
Mottled by hurried abstraction and inattention

A person who had not seen this masterpiece created
Might think it to be refuse and pass it by unknowingly
Letting be obscured the deep beauty of its many scenes
By layers of the tarnish of mistreatment

But as the painter
I see beyond the dark smears
To recall the hours that I attended to the details
And wonder how I could let it become so discolored

The painting that took me my life to create
Has lost its divinity in my careless treatment
And even if I were to refine it
I fear you would always see it as it is today

So today I paint a new masterpiece
One inspired by the muse of respect
A work that you can love through our old age
One that you will look to each day for inspiration

This one will take some time
As I want my brushstrokes to be carefully placed
I need to move steadily to ensure that this time,
My art represents my dream

This is my opus
Don't judge me on my past works
As I have never before had so much skill and inspiration
And never before have I wanted to please you as I do today

With you and my children as my muse
I will paint for you a lifetime
A portrait of devotion and friendship
A panorama of passion and admiration

All I ask is that you gaze upon it with an open heart
And you shall unquestionably love me again